versuri 08.16.19 - worthy

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berk just snapped on this one ho

august 16th

dear colin
we were not close, but not distance
since you left we been conversating
and honestly i cannot deny that my mind has been racing
my mind has been racing
my mind has been racing
ive had a bunch of bad thoughts about suicide


messed up living i forget how to sleep and dream
caught up in the world where everybody seems to be a fiend
get the money, get the cream
live your life to the extreme
calm down calm down maybe i just gotta calm down
cuz i’ve been getting way to high i just need to come down
but still after there’s a lot pondering in my mind now
waiting for the right moment but there’s no perfect time now
you took your life to shine light hoping others could see it
hard to talk you feel like they don’t know about the feeling
crazy how life is so beautiful but unappealing
a lot on your mind but you stayed persevering
you took the weight of others
and put them over your burdens
how did you carry that weight?
one thing on my mind everything is a steak
can’t read between the lines i’m blind from all the hate
are you really your worst enemy at the end of the day?
i swear
demons in head don’t know where they live
does everybody have demons that they up against?
tired of jumping the fence
i need something to hold onto
colin can you take my hand
and everyone listening to this song who
says they ain’t perfect
i swear you worth it
i’m tryna believe in that too
we gotta find our purpose
where did the conversation go about mental health
too many people in this world have thoughts about k!lling themselves
i wanna save a life
i wanna be the light
ci know you watching tell me if i’m doing wrong or right
please give me a sign i’m so tired of all these nights
with cold sweats at 3am with insecurities inside
i’m tired of hiding – its time to break my silence
ever since you died it seems the world’s been having more problems

can’t cope with they emotions they forced to down the whole bottle
i downed a whole bottle, praying for tomorrow, emerged in my sorrows

2x you gave me my life life back i swear that i mean it

you’ve found my reason
when i got called you died i swore that i was dreaming
curiosity rushed my brain i’m praying this pretend
how could this be the end? my body stiff i feel nothing
it woke me up
at the vigil it was like me and a thousand people
saying i love you i got you like we each others heroes
seeing your casket it felt like you were being buried alive
been to too many funerals i forget to cry
forget my mind i hope you been loving the promise land
and god has taking you by the hand, showing the love that you’ve spread
how much everybody loved you, how much everybody cared
i hate the fact that you had to leave to get reassurance there
i’ve been afraid to go up those stairs
its sad that this all got me thinking like

what if i died?
what if i lost faith in life
and felt tired of being hopeless
while bottling it all inside


taking caution
hoping to god that n0body notice
my mind has spinning whirlpool of emotions
like would y’all even miss me?
with all the grudges that these people hold against me
would they put that all aside and miss my good energy
saying he was a good person and didn’t have to pretend to be
and now i’m thinking
who speaking at the pulpit
what pictures y’all put in the booklet
would tears be steaming from ya faces
or smiling from the memories we created
would y’all be reminiscing or celebrating
would my mom keep my room or take it make it vacant?
i’ve felt forsaken yeah i’ve been mistaken
our lives have been worth living all along
you can talk about your feelings please don’t do it all alone
that’s why i wrote this song
or you could call it a letter
i’m really happy we both feeling better
we both got our heads up dealing with no pressure
trying to find the right words and make it sound clever
but me and you have gone through different endeavors
talking about mental health this is no lecture
colin take over my pen you can direct me
to say what they need to hear so unexpectedly

we all got problems we hide
we all got problems we hide
we all got problems we hide
sometimes it can eat you alive
but you don’t say it how you gonna survive
this is the time to get help that you need
reassurance and clarity to love yourself d-mn

i feel l did a lot of growing
responsibilities showing
you really helped me keep in check with all of my emotions
times been rough, but somehow i stayed focused
tryna go through life and all of its d-mn motions
if i can than i know you can too
you really paved a light for all of us and that what ima do
devote my life to helping people
and making this world a better place
i know this road is long but there’s gonna be better days

and it’s all because of you and god’s amazing grace
we’ll be in touch but this long distance ain’t the same
keep watching over us and together we pray
that them temptation of lucifer will go away


- versuri worthy

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